Tuesday, April 21, 2009

My dad, the Creeposaurus.

I have hesitated to post this story, because I thought the girl in question might read it, and reading it might make things very awkward... and though it may not seem like it, awkward situations are things I generally try to avoid. I realize that may not actually be a problem though, since nobody reads this anyway.

So here's the story: My dad took me and one of his friends to lunch a week or so ago, since we were all working together. As we were driving to lunch, my dad, always the entertainer, started telling his friend about what our family had done for Easter... and this is where our scene begins.

My dad: So we all went out to dinner, Jacob brought his.... what is she to you?
Me: ......
My Dad: What is Heather to you?
Me: My friend.
My dad: Moving toward more?
Me: .....
My dad: Anyway, she is just a striking gal... with these beautiful eyes that you could get lost staring at.
My dads friend: Could we call her your friend with benefits?... or your sex puppet?
Me (wondering how safe it is to jump out of a truck moving 35 mph): No. No we could not call her that.

Thanks... Now I won't be able to look at her eyes without thinking of my skeevy creepster father, or his pervert friend.

Here, get lost looking at these Photobucket


  1. No. I do not. Who knows what will happen though?

    (answer: The Shadow knows)

  2. Is it heather lauer? the author of bacon: a love story? she's a keeper man!!! those are benefits beyond your fathers imagination! and not even creepy!